What’s this whole idea of not telling your children “no”? How is that even biblical? Heck…how is that even logical? In case you’re wondering…..it’s not….in any way whatsoever.
I’m not a mom. Far from it. I am a part-time nanny though. Being a nanny has taught me oodles. Such as:
- Teaching a 9 year old boy to talk in a british accent so you two can have lengthy conversations about mostly nothing in particular is incredibly amusing.
- Verbally describing each spelling word is not nearly as effective as acting it out….which also provides worlds of laughter.
- Yelling rarely gets them to shutup, and rarely gains their respect. Instead, speaking in your normal tone with firmness gets the point across rather beautifully. I learned that quickly lol
Through nannying, I have learned when to say no and when to let things slide. Sometimes, kids just need to be kids. There’s nothing wrong with that. Kids like to scream, make weird noises, wrestle with each other, go outside and get dirty, etc. I see a lot of moms yell and panic when their child even so much as looks at mud! Lol, for pete’s sake, it’s not like the mud is going to eat them alive.
But, there is also a time to say “no”. I don’t understand this awful concept of not telling your children “no”. It honestly makes no sense to me. Maybe I’m just logically not all there or somehow that tidbit of ‘wisdom’ passed over me, looked down upon my ‘wisdomless’ state, shrugged it shoulders, and passed me by. Either way, I stand pretty firm in my belief that the word “no” is rather beautiful.
I may not be a mom, but I know the outcome and damage from the lack of the word. Even as small children, they learn to disrespect, because why would anyone respect anyone who gives them everything and lets them do anything? Children need the discipline and boundaries. They need consequences to learn that certain decisions lead to certain endings. They will never fully grow up and be able to function correctly as adults without that crucial lesson.
It honestly breaks my heart to watch kids grow up with lack of discipline. No one wants to be around them, and they’re typically just a nuisance. Sounds harsh, I know, but it’s true. If you’ve experienced being around an undisciplined child, you understand.
So many parents these days feel the need to be their child’s ‘friend’, which is great. I’m not against that at all. My mom is one of my closest friends. But there is a time for that. Kids need parents, not friends. They can find friends at school or other activities. But, especially when the child is young, they need their mom and dad to be just that. A mom and dad.